“The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing…not healing, not curing…that is a friend who cares.” C.S. Lewis
- Your greatest gift is your presence. Just being there while a person cries or deals with grief in their own way is extremely helpful.
- Listen unconditionally and without distraction. If they want to talk about their loved one listen with an open heart.
- Avoid trying to make them feel better with platitudes or the “bright side.” No one wants to hear, “It was for the best,” even if it might be true. It is better to admit,”I don’t know what to say,” than try to cheer them up.
- Share your own happy memories of the loved one. A lovely memento of written stories, memories and photos compiled in a scrapbook will be treasured later (ask other mutual relatives and friends to contribute).
- Sending or preparing food makes a more practical gift than flowers. Grieving people can forget to eat. A meal or gift card from a restaurant that delivers is always appreciated.
- If someone remains in a hopeless state or has difficulty functioning in daily life, take action. Grief Coaching can provide the appropriate help and be a wonderful gift.
If you’re feeling helpless and would like additional tips for supporting your grieving friend or family member, contact Dhyanis for a free 1/2-hour phone session.
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